


We All Lie

by K1mHeechu1, of_feathers_and_bowstrings



Category: Figure Skating RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn, Soulmate AU, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2020-03-04 22:39:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18822196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/K1mHeechu1/pseuds/K1mHeechu1, https://archiveofourown.org/users/of_feathers_and_bowstrings/pseuds/of_feathers_and_bowstrings
Summary: His parents allow him to get a tattoo for his 11th birthday.He spends some time thinking a lot about what name to put on his arm.Eventually, he decides on a name. A generic, Spanish name.It's not like there will ever be actual Elite-class Spanish Skaters.It's a safe choice.Or: Everyone has their soulmate's name tattooed on their arm.Of course Yuzuru Hanyu would be the exception to that rule





	1. Yuzu

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, guys! This is just a fun thing we decided to do. So, hope you enjoy! :)
> 
> No Shomas were injured while making this story.

Yuzuru has known about the existence of soulmates for a while now. It’s an important part of society and his teachers and parents have always kept him well-informed about the matter. But the truth is that Yuzuru doesn’t really care about such a thing. He’s got a skating career to think about, after all. He may only be competing in novice competitions now but one day he is determined to stand on top of the highest stop on the Olympic podium at Sochi. He has no time to deal with things like soulmates. So, when he turns ten—the designated age to be marked with the name of your soulmate—and no name appears for him, Yuzuru considers it a good thing. It’s less of a distraction if he doesn’t have to worry about finding his soulmate.

But that is not the norm. Everyone has a soulmate. Everyone is branded with a name, except Yuzuru.

All his classmates’ arms have names on them in bold, black letters. Yet, Yuzuru’s arm is completely bare. It doesn’t take long for the teasing to start up. Children can be cruel, sometimes. Yuzuru tries to get through his days, trying to not let the mocking laughter of his classmates get to him or the way his teachers look down on him with pity but Yuzuru hates pity. At ten years old, Yuzuru is without a soulmate and learns that the world isn't such a great place. When something is different people immediately set out to alienate that thing. Yuzuru is not a thing, he knows he is worth more than this, but the way people scrutinize him these days, he’s starting to feel less and less human.

When his mother holds him at night as he cries in her arms, Yuzuru wishes that he could have been blessed with a soulmate. Not necessarily for himself, but for his parents and sister. It’s not just Yuzuru who receives the backlash for being different, after all. His entire family suffers because of him and he hates himself for that.

“I-I’m sorry, Mom.” Yuzuru sniffles, getting snot all over his mother’s shirt sleeve. “I’m sorry I’m so weird and not normal.”

“No, no. None of that.” His mother says, gently, pulling back to wipe away his tears. “Yuzu, you are my son. I love you no matter what.”

“B-but people— “

“Don’t worry about that. People will be people. All you need to be is Yuzuru, okay?”

“Okay…”

Being Yuzuru isn’t simple though. Especially when he trains at a rink full of kids and their parents that seem to spend more time whispering and gossiping about him than anything else. Nanami-sensei tries to keep his mind off it, tells him to skate for himself and not think about anything else, but it’s difficult. Yuzuru has always been acutely aware of the things around him. The slightest change in his environment throws him off and any sort of negative energy affects more than it should.

“Did you hear? That boy has no soulmate.” Yuzuru’s fingers still as he’s tying his skates up at the rink.

“There must be something wrong with him. Do you think it’s the parents?”

Yuzuru’s laces snap as he pulls too tightly. He feels heat rising in his cheeks and tears starting to sting his eyes. He furiously rubs at his face before making quick work of his laces. He doesn’t want to be here anymore. He doesn’t want to listen to any more of their poison. He wants to escape. So, he does. He removes his skate guards, hands them over to Nanami-sensei, and takes to the ice. As his blades make contact with ice, the tension in his body begins to melt away. With every stroke, every spin, and every jump, Yuzuru forgets about the stupid soulmate business. He forgets about names and destiny and everything he doesn’t have. ‘Why do I have to belong to anyone, anyway? Why should I belong to anyone but myself?’

He distracts himself with visions of a sea of Japanese flags, of Japan’s national anthem playing, and his neck adorned with an Olympic gold medal. That’s when he catches an edge suddenly and nearly faceplants into the ice. The vision shatters and he’s back in the overcrowded rink, there’s people staring, and Yuzuru feels like a germ under a microscope. Yuzuru dashes off the ice, hastily puts on his blade guards and retreats to the locker room, ignoring Nanami-sensei calling after him. He finds a quiet corner and hugs his knees to his chest. The tears don’t stop falling even when his mother comes to retrieve him, and he has to utter a quiet, shaky apology to his coach for running away.

* * *

 

It takes some convincing, but his parents allow him to get a tattoo for his 11th birthday. It’s not very orthodox but it’s the only way. His parents were initially reluctant about it, especially his mother who has always told him that it’s okay to be himself, but Yuzuru can only take so much teasing and harassing. He’s about to enter middle school. It’s a fresh start and he wants to be able to live without feeling like some freak of nature. If he gets a tattoo, no one will be able to tell the difference. He’s going to a school where no one knows him. He can fake it there and no one will call him out for it.

He spends some time thinking a lot about what name to put on his arm. Yuzuru is quick to come to the decision that he won’t be using any Japanese names because that’s much too risky and he doesn’t want to become anyone’s accidental soulmate. So, he decides on a foreign name. Sure, Yuzuru will encounter more foreign skaters once he starts competing internationally, but it’s a little safer. Yuzuru spends hours online, searching for names to use. Eventually, he decides on the name Javier Fernández. It’s a bit generic for a Spanish name but he thinks it’s his safest bet. After all, there are no Spanish skaters.

As Yuzuru is sitting in the big leather chair at the tattoo shop, his eyes scan the walls covered with various designs, colors, and patterns. They’re all so interesting! His eyes light up when he finds a cute Winnie-the Pooh- design hidden among a collection of Disney themed designs. He’s not here for Winnie-the-Pooh, though. He’s here for a fake name. It hurts a little to get the tattoo done but Yuzuru is no stranger to pain. It’s all part of being an athlete, especially a figure skater when you’re constantly slipping and crashing onto the ice. Still, Yuzuru can’t help but wince every so often but is careful not to squirm too much. His mother is beside him, worry evident all over her face and she keeps brushing his hair. Yuzuru tries to focus on his mother’s fingers instead of the intense burning on his arm. When it’s done, the tattoo artist gives him and his mother detailed instructions for aftercare. Yuzuru looks down at his forearm and hovers his fingers over the fancy black letters. His skin his pink and puffy at the edges of the ink, irritated and a little swollen. But he’ll bear with it because at least now he can be normal. Or at least, pretend to be.

Life gets a little easier to manage after that. Yuzuru starts middle school and everyone is nice. No one treats him any different. In fact, he finds that no one asks about the name on his arm nor do they care to. It’s just enough to have something there and that works just fine with Yuzuru. The less people talk about it or look at it, the better. Now, he can just focus on himself and his skating.

* * *

 

Yuzuru doesn’t think about the name for a long time. He continues to skate, steadily rises higher in the ranks. Now that he’s competing internationally, he must cover up the name. It’s a rule that Yuzuru’s is the most thankful for among any ISU rule. It allows him to concentrate on himself and less of the fear people might see it.

Yuzuru ends up having a successful Junior season, claiming victory in all competitions, including the Junior World Championships. After the crappy season last year, he considers this season’s sweep a pretty awesome victory. It’s exhilarating to know that he’s just that much closer to achieving his goal of that Olympic gold. It’s so close, he can almost taste it.

When Yuzuru moves up to Seniors the following season, he’s so excited! It’s tougher than he thought but it’s fun and Yuzuru has always loved challenges. The challenge comes in the form of stabilizing his quad toe. Quads are starting to become the hot new thing in the skating world and Yuzuru is thrilled. He’s even more thrilled when he manages to land his first quad toe at NHK Trophy. His first Grand Prix assignment. He doesn’t make the podium, but he takes pride in the fact that he managed to land the quad and fourth place isn’t a bad place to be for his first Senior competition.

His next GP assignment brings him to Russia, the home country of his beloved idol. Just being in Russia fills Yuzuru up with so much energy and excitement that he can’t stop bouncing around. He’s horribly restless as he goes through his warm-up routine. Nanami-sensei has had to calm him down a couple of times to prevent from vibrating into space. Her words, not his. But he can’t help it! His emotions feel like they’re bubbling over. There are butterflies in his tummy and his heart is pumping so fast but Yuzuru just takes it as a sign that he’s ready to go. He’s ready to go out and skate and maybe, just maybe take home his first senior medal.

It turns out too much excitement can be a bad thing. As he jumps up and down, Nanami-sensei, puts her hands on his shoulders to keep him planted on the ground. “Yuzu, your nose is bleeding!” She says in exasperation, pulling out tissues from Pooh-san and pressing them to his nose.

“Ah!” Yuzuru yelps, taking the tissue. He wipes up what he can but finds that the blood is still coming. So, he takes out a couple more tissues to wad up and stuff in his nose. “There! Problem solved!”

Nanami-sensei rolls her eyes. “I can’t believe you gave yourself a nosebleed.”

“I’m excited! Aren’t you excited?”

“I am but I also know how to contain myself.” Yuzuru smiles sheepishly, looking all kinds of ridiculous with tissues up his nose. “Alright, go wash your face in the bathroom. You look silly.”

Yuzuru nods, giving a quick bow before jogging away. He’s still buzzing with so much energy that it doesn’t register that he’s running like an awkward penguin. Nor does he really pay attention and ends up bumping into someone. Steady arms come around him, holding him steady.

“Oh!” Yuzuru blushes. “Sorry, did not see.”

“It’s okay.”

Yuzuru looks up when he hears the heavy accent. The first thing he notices are the eyes. Their large, brown doe eyes framed by thick, curling lashes. The next thing he notices is the all too bright, sunny smile.  ‘Cute boy,’ his mind unhelpfully supplies. Yuzuru becomes even more mortified when he realizes the state he’s in. He flushes bright red and all but jumps back from the other boy’s hold to quickly cover up his face.

“Sorry, so sorry. Excuse me.” He mutters, bowing profusely, before scurrying away to the bathroom in shame.

He throws away the tissues and splashes water on his face, trying to keep the screaming internal. It wouldn’t be very ideal for him to start screaming randomly in a public bathroom. People would think he’s crazy. Which he isn’t. He doesn’t think so, anyway. Yuzuru looks in the mirror to make sure all the blood is gone first before groaning, burying his face in his hands. ‘I can’t believe I just embarrassed myself like that in front of a cute boy. Good job, Hanyu.’

Yuzuru sighs, grabbing a towel to dry off his face before heading back to Nanami-sensei who immediately asks him why he took so long. He’s too embarrassed to tell her what happened so he just tells her he got lost. She doesn’t look convinced and Yuzuru doesn’t blame her, considering the bathroom is quite literally just around the corner. But she lets it slide and just tells him to get ready for the 6-minute warm-up.

Yuzuru is just about to set up for the quad toe when it happens.

“Javier Fernández.” Yuzuru slips up and pops the jump. His head jerks up and he can’t help but touch the bandage covering up the same exact name. His eyes scan the rink until they land on the cute boy from earlier, giving slight acknowledgement to his introduction.

‘Oh…’it feels like an entire bucket of ice water has been dumped over his head. Yuzuru blinks once, then twice, thrice, and then the alarm bells start ringing loudly in his head. ‘Oh…oh shit.’

 


	2. Javi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're baaaaack!!   
> And it hasn't even been a full year!! I call that progress (hides so nothing the readers throw at them will actually hit them)  
> Thanks for waiting so patiently for so long!!  
> Happy reading!!

 

Javier Fernandez has wanted to find his soulmate from the very moment he learned of their existence, when right before Laura turned 10, their parents sat both of them down and explained how, when people turn 10, they get a tattoo on their arm, and that that tattoo tells you your soulmate's name. Your soulmate is your best match, the only person out there that is completely designed to be right for you.

 

Javier remembers jumping up and down when Laura gets her tattoo. A traditionally Spanish name on her wrist, written in barely readable chicken scrawl, but Laura is instantly able to read it.

 

He spends  two years daydreaming about his soulmate. He imagines both of them playing football, and skating together. Sometimes, his soulmate is a pretty girl, long hair and soft skin, gentle, small smile on her lips. Other times, his soulmate is a boy, all shiny eyes and a squeaky laugh, warmth seeping through every single giggle he emits.

 

The morning of Javier's 10th birthday, he gets woken up abruptly by his sister jumping onto his bed and on top of him. He gets instructions to get ready for breakfast and his sister leaves his room, leaving him alone again. He thinks about closing his eyes for a second before he remembers.

 

It's his 10th birthday.

 

He hurriedly peels his pyjamas away from his arm and checks for a mark.

  
  
  


It's there, innocently lying there, imprinted on his skin.

 

A cluster of small, neat letters, followed by four squiggly shapes, but he ignores those, as he has no idea what they mean.

  
  
  


**Hanyu Yuzuru  羽生結弦**

  
  
  
  


Hanyu? His soulmate's name is Hanyu? What kind of name is that?

 

He stares at his tattoo for a few more moments, before running to the kitchen, where his sister and father are sitting by the table, and barrels right into his mother's legs.

 

"Mamá, look, look, look!" He shows her his arm, jumping up and down.

 

"Javier, sweetheart, stay still. I can't read it if you keep jumping."

 

His mom stays quiet for a few seconds and then smiles, looking at him, and then at his dad.

 

"What is it?"

 

"We should've known. We have a local one and an international one joining the family in the future, it seems."

 

"Really?" His dad stands up and takes a look at his soulmate mark. "Oh yeah, that looks Asian. Maybe Chinese or Japanese, judging by these characters."

 

Javier spends the rest of his day having fun, running around with his friends, and eating cake.

 

And when he goes to bed that night, he looks at his soulmate mark and decides that his soulmate, his Yuzuru, (as he learned from one of his friend Noe's mum, who is Japanese, is his soulmate's name and Hanyu is their last name) would be the most loved person ever.

 

He thinks about it and comes to the conclusion that his soulmate must be foreign.

 

And Javier has been debating about what to do for a while now. He wants to play football, and he also likes skating. But while there are a few good internationally known Japanese football players, there are far more internationally known Japanese figure skaters.

 

So he decides he'll put his all into skating.

 

Skating will lead him to his soulmate, he decides.

 

And as he falls asleep, left hand wrapped around his right arm, fingers softly tracing the letters on his skin, a small voice tells him he was always going to choose skating over football.

 

He might be a child from the land of sun and sea, but his veins and lungs are full of ice, and he would always choose the ice over anything.

 

A small part of him wonders if he'd ever have to choose between the ice and his soulmate.

 

He falls asleep before he can actually analyse that thought, and it's gone in the morning.

  
  
  


He grows up, skates, and thinks of his soulmate.

 

He moves to train and is so alone. So alone most nights he cries into his pillow, hiding his tears from his roommate. Sergei is a cool guy, but he doesn't need to know the smiley kid he sees most days is just a facade, hiding the broken, scared and homesick teenager Javier really is these days.

 

He moves away from his country, from his language, from his mom, and his dad, and the sister he has always followed around like a little duckling.

 

Now he has no one to follow around. Now he's being forced to grow up and take care of himself, and listen to the orders of a coach that promises gold and glory but treats him like he's trash. Like he's replaceable, just another kid to train, another kid he'll replace with a newer, shinier model the second he breaks or gives up.

 

He crashes and crashes again, but he never breaks or gives up. He gets up, dusts the ice chips off his training clothes and tries again.

 

He's so alone, so so alone. But never lonely.

 

Because, every night, he can trace the letters of his soulmate's name and wish.

 

Wish for them to appear. To be there, on the ice, waiting for him.

 

He goes to Vancouver, the first from Spain to ever skate at the Olympics. _ 'Are you watching, Yuzuru? _ ' he wonders as he finishes 14th. _ 'Are you looking for me? Do you want to find me as much as I want to find you?' _

 

Training gets harder and harder to endure.

 

He hates his coach, and he hates the city, and he feels out of place everywhere. Every single time he thinks he's starting to get used to it, they move locations and he's back to the starting point, trying to get used to another language, another accent, another city, another rink. The members of the training group change far too quickly, and he's terrified he'll be kicked out and that one of the new guys that join the group will be his replacement.

 

They're all sitting in the living room of the shared house they're living in, and Javier decides to actually pay attention instead of reading the book he's holding. He has read the same paragraph five times anyway. His focus is no longer there.

 

He sees the kids standing next to the rink, waiting to start warming up, and his brain supplies him with the information: he's watching Junior Worlds.

 

Not that nice of him, he knows, but he tends to ignore the juniors, at least unless he personally knows them, or they're exceptionally good and moving up (though in that case, his brain doesn't think "competition", but "great, another kid that will kick me down a place or two" instead.)

 

"Yuzuru Hanyu." The announcer exclaims, and his eyes widen as he sees a small Japanese boy bow and greet the audience and judges.  Billowy, pale, blue sleeves move as he waves.

 

No one notices anything strange. All his training mates keep talking, eating and watching, yet for Javier, time suddenly stops.

 

Yuzuru Hanyu.

 

Yuzuru Hanyu.

 

His mark tingles and his heart beats so fast, he's certain it's going to jump right out of his chest.

 

Yuzuru.

 

That's his Yuzuru, there's no doubt about that.

 

That chubby-cheeked, dark-haired kid that's circling the rink in the last warm-up group for Junior Worlds, looking far too focused.

 

That is his soulmate.

 

He can feel it, in every single cell of his body, with every single breath he takes.

 

He found him.

 

That's him.

 

That's his Yuzuru.

  
  


Javier stops breathing when he starts skating. And suddenly absolutely nothing else in the world matters, just his soulmate's beautiful, soaring 3A, and his moves, still tinted with the childish awkwardness of someone who's still trying to get over a growth spurt. Javier can see Yuzuru will be big. Yuzuru will be great.

 

His eyes fill with tears when Yuzuru gets the gold.

 

His soulmate.

 

His Yuzuru.

  
  
  


The days fly by in a whirlwind of training, and more training, and every time he wants to give up, he remembers Yuzuru's smile as he stared at the gold medal around his neck.

 

And every time he feels alone, he traces Yuzuru's name with the tips of his fingers.

 

And he goes on.

  
  
  
  
  


And suddenly, the day comes for Javier to compete against Yuzuru.

 

He had honestly expected him to stay in Juniors at least one more year, but he can't lie and say he doesn't feel like he was going to die from either nerves or excitement at having been assigned to the same event as Yuzuru.

  
  


He decides to avoid Yuzuru at all costs. He knows once he loses his focus, he won't be able to get it back together. And meeting Yuzuru face to face for the first time would more than likely make him lose all semblance of focus sooner than he could say 3A.

 

His coach looks at him like he will kill him if he keeps fidgeting next to him, so he decides to walk up and down the hall. He tries to breathe slowly, to make the anxiety melt. He turns around and collides with someone. His hands instinctively reach out to stabilise the other person, and his arms close around a smaller body, steadying it against his own to avoid any possible fall or injury.

 

"Oh!" A high pitched, voice exclaims, surprised. "Sorry, did not see."

 

Javier is dying. Or might possibly already be dead.

 

“It’s okay.”

 

Yuzuru.

 

It's Yuzuru.

 

He's holding his soulmate in his arms.

 

Yuzuru looks up when he hears his voice, and Javier can't help but stare at his face, the plump, youthful-looking skin, the small mouth, the corners of his lips curl upwards like a kitten, as if he's perpetually smiling, or grinning at something only he knows. The beautiful, huge, dark eyes, phoenix shaped, framed by equally dark eyelashes. The wads of paper tissues stuffed up his nose, obviously trying to stop the remnants of a nosebleed from staining his costume.

 

He can't help the smile that lights up his face.

 

He has never felt as complete as he feels right then, even if his soulmate currently looks like a whole weirdo.

 

Yuzuru blushes, cheeks fire engine red and jumps back, away from his hold, covering his face with his hands.

 

“Sorry, so sorry. Excuse me.” Yuzuru bows at him repeatedly before running away.

  
  


Javier watches him go and knows he's absolutely fucked.

 

The emptiness in his chest feels like it's being filled with ice shavings, freezing him from the inside out as he, once again, can only trace his soulmate mark over the layers of both his costume and the protective bandage all skaters under 18 are forced to use, to preserve their privacy, and hide the name of their soulmates until they reach adulthood.

 

He sighs and goes back to Nikolai. His coach looks at him, opening his mouth to say something. He stops, shakes his head and makes him get ready for the 6-minute warm-up.

 

Yuzuru skates out before he does, and he bites his lip before taking his place on the ice.

 

His name is called, and he smiles and bows.

 

He looks at Yuzuru, who looks pale and surprised.

 

His feet start skating towards him before he stops himself and forces himself to continue with his warm-up before Nikolai murders him and turns him into human tapas with his own skates.

 

_ ‘Mierda, mierda, mierda, mierda, mierda, mierda, mierda, mier...’ _

 

His eyes keep straying towards Yuzuru.

 

_ 'Do you recognise my name? Do you know I'm your soulmate? Do you want to get to know me as much as I want to get to know you?' _

 

He takes a deep breath, shakes his head and speeds up his strokes.

  
  


_ 'Mierda. I must be going mad. I'm going mad, aren't I? Shit, shit, shit.' _

  
  


_ 'Are you looking at me? Do you want to talk to me as much as I want to talk to you?' _

 

_ 'Shit, I must've really lost my mind now. Shit.' _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS, this chapter be for Toby♥


End file.
